I cannot help but think of the things I said on my previous blog. I couldn't believe myself. Was it really me spilling the beans out of the bag? Career-wise (or shall I say because of low self-esteem), I never complained about anything when it comes to my job. Every time my attention was being called by my superior, there is always this thing that comes in my mind; I did something wrong again. I admit I had blunders in the past. They were all part of my struggle in the real world, perhaps the so-called lessons that would mold me into a better person.

But alas! Those struggles were not considered as part of my learning. Instead, it was regarded as condemnation of my persona. It was like I am in the middle of an arena full of scrutinizing spectators. I was noticeable whenever I took the wrong step but disregarded of commendable doings. Probably that drained the assertiveness in me. I started to become coward, to become passive, and took all the crappy things those people tried to stuff in my head.

Then something happened that drew me away from that nightmare. I realized I can never be who I am if I continue to be under those Mr./Ms.-know-it-all people. I became conscious of what was really going on; it was a wake up call for me. The fear of losing my job was still there, but the hunger for freedom dominated my whole being. Yes, I left the arena where I was in, with high hopes that I can find a place where freedom and respect are defended.

Needless to say, we all have our dream jobs. Some of us think of a hefty salary, while others think of comfort and healthy relationship at work. Mind you, I belonged to the group who does hunger for a highly-paid job. I have worked my #&s out, landed from one company to another just to fill my bill. Well luckily, I had it - thanks to my undaunted patience and my Master's guidance.

Working for that company was a baptism of fire for me. I was so clueless of how things run there. I did not even know how to do my job. Funny, eh? Anyway it was frightful but challenging. Months passed and I became so overwhelmed by how things went on. I wanted to quit. But because of my new-found friends' support and advice, I continued my blind-folded journey with hopes that I could emerge from the dark pit that I was in.

Becoming a good employee is not learned overnight. It is an ongoing learning process with hindrances along the way. But once you do well in your task and develop a healthy relationship with your boss and workmates, it sure is the start of you becoming the best in your craft.

But what if your boss does not have the leadership, does not have empathy to his employees, and thinks of just saving his neck all the time? Who only listens to his self-centered comrades of higher ranks that treat ordinary company people like dirt? Sad but true. If you are with these people at work, chances are you will sooner face the pitfall of your career, thus leaving you battered just like what happened to me.